May 30, 2016
As adults we believe we are the teachers of the youth of our communities when in fact I have found that there is so much to learn from them. I often sit back in awe as I watch children bravely face the world. Whether it be climbing to the top of the tall slide on the playground, approaching a group of other children playing uninvited, waving hello to a homeless man on the corner or running towards the high rushing waves of an ocean that they are visiting for the first time. “Why can’t I be like that,” I would often say to myself. No fear of the unknown, no worries about what may or may not happen…just living freely. Granted children aren’t aware of all the dangers and risks that exist in this world however it is something to admire when you don’t allow your fears to hold you back from reaching your dreams or living authentically.
Have you ever met someone who will just seemingly up and move half way across the world without giving it a second thought? Or someone who finally quit their job that they hated and had no interest in to pursue their dream? Or maybe someone who lived without a fear of being judged about their outer appearance or how they lived their life although it was deemed by many as “socially unacceptable?” I have! And I have always applauded their fearlessness. Many of us live a life of playing it safe. Dreaming…wondering…thinking about the what if’s of life. I too lived a life playing it safe. I wanted my next move to always be planned to the T; nothing could be done out of order. And then one day it hit me like a ton of bricks. I was tired of somewhat living an “average life.” Loving what I did for a living but finding my beliefs did not align with the mission of the companies I worked for. Everyday I would wake up…”Is this it Kim?” I would say to myself as I dragged myself from the bed after hitting the snooze button 5 times. “Is this what you are going to be doing until you retire at 67 years old?” or it will probably be 90 by the time I retire; let’s be real. Day after day would go by and I began to live for the weekends. The weekends that seemed to be 2 hours long and then it was time for what seemed like a 1000 hour work week.
I started to look at all those people I applauded who I identified as brave and fearless…my toddler son being one of them. I decided to reach out to them to ask how they did it? What were they thinking? Did they have any regrets? Some told me they were broke and they had to significantly adjust their lifestyle. Others said they felt led to do it and felt like the timing was right. Others said they prayed about it and their move was simply an act of faith. But all of them said they would do it all over again and had no regrets. I thought to myself, “Wow, so that’s it…just like that?” I then started to challenge my own ways of thinking and realized fear is primarily a mental state. I started to think about how much time I really spent at work (on average 40+ hours a week) and concluded I spend way too much time at work not to love what I do and who I do it for. Let’s face it we spend more time at our jobs with co-workers than we do awake in our own homes with our loved ones. I got tired of living for the weekends and being known as the one who seemed to have it all together which I attributed was due to the structure I tried to live my life by but the Lord knew I didn’t have it all together…I still don’t and I honestly probably never will. However I say all this to say if fear has been in the driver seat on your journey throughout life this far I challenge you to think about your life if fear continues to drive it verses if you kick fear out the driver’s seat at the next stop light.
We have one life to live and we should make the most of it. With a world full of hate and lost we shouldn’t take life for granted as tomorrow or even the next second is not promised. So instead of putting off what you can do today for tomorrow or next week go ahead and figure out what it looks like and what it will truly take to achieve the goals you have set for your life. No longer live in a prison guarded by Fear but find that little kid inside of you who is fearless and seize your opportunity…whatever it is. I finally took my own advice after years of admiring others from afar. My journey of starting a private practice has been one of the most challenging but one of the best decisions I have ever made. It’s been scary but soul quenching, hard but heart felt and risky but rewarding. I thank God daily for giving me the drive, strength, courage, resources and passion to do something about my situation and follow my heart. I also pray to him for continued strength, drive, courage, resources, passion and a few other things since we are being honest. And let me be clear this could pertain to ending a damaging relationship with a friend, leaving a job, revealing a secret to a loved one, exiting a dead end relationship or confronting a family member. Those things all qualify as things that fear (“playing it safe”) keeps us from doing. Map out your vision, write out the pros and cons for your vision and the rest will come. Once you take back your life from fear of judgement, hatred, being unaccepted or criticized, etc you will feel 100 pounds lighter despite others reaction towards your truth. I guarantee it! It’s YOUR life..only YOU can live it and YOU deserve to live it authentically. Be encouraged…you got this!
Peace & Light,